Marija, 44, Wells
I was born old, and I get younger every year. My first years of life were spent in body casts to correct a medical problem. Usually we face medical difficulties when we’re old. I hope I faced all mine in those early years. Growing up with alcoholic parents and troubled siblings forced me to take the responsible role in the family. I was cooking family dinners by age 10, and taking care of a newborn at 14, learning the challenges of changing diapers and 2 a.m. feedings. By age 16, my family shattered, the parents abandoning the children and going their separate ways, and the baby was out of my life forever. Painful moments, these.
Struggling to graduate high school and not able to afford college, I was jettisoned into the world of work. I took the first job that came my way – computer punch card operator, and learned by osmosis the ins and outs of computers. Steady on my feet, I then began growing young. I fell in love with a wonderfully unconventional older man when I turned 23, and we danced together for many years. We planted gardens and discovered how easy it was to grow beans and tomatoes. I learned the joys of digging in the dirt and making mud pies. We watched insects for hours while lying on our stomachs in the front yard. We discovered the wonders of the woods, the mysteries of mushrooms, and the delight of a simple salad on a summer evening. At age 30 I entered college for the first time, reveling in the rituals of 18-year-olds. At age 35, I learned to swim, to play hopscotch, to hike, and to laugh at myself. By age 40, I learned the difficult lesson that playfulness is more important for balance in life than all-out work, and configured my world accordingly. I now take regular recess breaks, and my boss approves.
Along the way, the love I was deprived of as a child found its way to me gradually, and I learned to open up, to love and be loved. I learned to give my heart, to let it be broken, to heal, and to give it again. But it took a long, long time to learn that basic baby step.
Marija—Age 44—Wells, ME
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