Mortgage
by Rhonda Laurel—Age 33—Irvington, NJ
I work in the mortgage industry and have been working in this field for a few years. I often say that the mortgage industry is the wasteland for people who had potential at some point in their lives to follow another career path but it didn’t pan out. I am surrounded by almost-actors, -writers, -designers and -doctors who somehow took a left turn on their personal path of the ‘straight and narrow’. This field has no concentrated degree. You cannot attend college and follow a specific program of study. It is ironic that one of the most vital things a person can do, securing a home for their family, rests in the hands of people who had no direct ambition to do it.
My daily job consists of analyzing information that people have committed to paper to help determine whether or not they are going to default on a loan. From the lending point of view there is no hopeful rosy story of dreams coming to life and a vision of a nuclear family reaching a milestone; the reality is the risk involved and whether or not you will pay the most important debt you will ever have, your mortgage and a bank doesn’t have to eat a bad lending decision.
I fit into this story because I am an almost writer struggling to be heard, be published and be paid. My evolution was from a natural progression of retail jobs, then to a bank and now the abstract mother land of semi professional abyss. I don’t wield a mop, but I do a lot of cleaning so people can get their loans. My daily mission is to remain an anonymous face in a sea of people so I can collect some income without the hassle of being over worked. Since this is not my true ambition I have often been caught in the middle of my own potential. My efficient work style calls attention to my abilities and gives people a sense that I should ‘do more’ or ‘be more’ but that would leave no time for my writing pursuits.
In the end I am dreamer chugging along on the choo choo train to Pleasantville. There autonomy is welcomed and I will be appreciated and respected for the contributions I make and no one will ask any more or any less of me.
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