400 Words


About 400 Words

400 Words is a storytelling project. It is a print magazine and a website, consisting of true stories, none over 400 words, by ordinary people on assigned themes. It's about the documentation of everyday life, saying a lot by saying a little. You can learn more, or order a copy, or tell a story of your own.

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Advertising Writer

by Corey—Age 28—Sioux Falls, SD

There’s a hum in my cubicle.

It’s filling the space between my ears. It’s not loud. But in my mind, it gets louder, slowly drowning out all other recognizable sounds. If I focus on it, it gets even louder. I put on my headphones. The hum is still there when I pull them away, persisting in a state of stasis, never adding or subtracting decibels, always becoming more apparent as I stare blindly at my computer, wishing the hum would just leave—just get the hell out of my cubicle and deliver itself on down the line.

I’m a writer, and writing becomes difficult when there’s a hum in the room. It distracts me. It’s frustrating. It’s constant. It continues to mock me, to scream at me, to remind me that I’ll never be Hemingway, that my career is worthless, that I might as well surf the internet a bit more and let everything wash out like a road map in the back seat of a car.

I write advertising, which to many people is a hum all its own. It’s a thankless, nameless profession. I am responsible for trying to persuade you that a trek to the grocery store for a candy bar is a good idea. Even when you come home and watch another commercial while eating your candy bar, my job is the same. To sell you another candy bar. My ultimate goal is to get you to buy a second candy bar, even after you’ve already eaten the first one—to make you get off of your couch, where you are sitting comfortably without a candy bar, with a stomach full of your first candy bar. To worm my way into your brain again.

Like this humming. Mostly, you drown me out. It all sounds the same. I can’t help that: it is all the same. Toilet paper, candy bars, political candidates, electronics, feminine hygiene, crackers, vehicles. Everything you see is persuasive. And you don’t care anymore. You’re used to it.

The only time you can ignore it is when you are fully engaged in something else. That’s when the advertising goes away. That’s when the hum goes away; when the bleating announcers and the picture perfect products melt away, leaving nothing but a blank screen where a television signal once belonged.

Maybe the humming is just a generator. I’ve never figured it out.


6 Comments

nice to see your hum getting picked up on this signal-perhaps there will be less hum in your cubicle now- nice read-congrats!

Posted by Paul D on 2 April 2007 @ 3pm

Right now, I’m reading ‘Dry’ by Augusten Burroughs. He’s most famous for ‘Running With Scissors,’ his memoir of twisted childhood/adolescence that recently got made into a movie, but this is my first encounter with his writing. ‘Dry’ is a memoir about being a young alcoholic, and then a young recovering alcoholic, in New York City. But it’s also about working in advertising in NYC in the dwindling days of the nineties. And I’m finding that part really fascinating. I go back and forth betwen envying the ad types their salaries and glamorous lifestyles (flying to LA for shoots!), pitying the shalloweness that Burroughs likes to play up in self-mocking fashion, and just enjoying the voyeuristic feeling of being a fly on the wall.

Posted by Katherine on 2 April 2007 @ 4pm

Well, let me tell you — advertising isn’t as glamorous when you’re in South Dakota.

Posted by Corey V. on 4 April 2007 @ 10pm

[…] an excerpt from 400 Words: Advertising Writer (by Me) I write advertising, which to many people is a hum all its own. It’s a thankless, […]

Posted by black marks on wood pulp » 400 words published online on 4 April 2007 @ 10pm

There’s some great irony in that you are annoyed by the humming and in some ways are the cause.

And just as we ignore so many ads, you have to ignore that voice that says your writing is worthless.

Posted by Ashton B on 14 April 2007 @ 11pm

Hmmm.

From what I see, we identify ourselves through products a lot. I say this from my Dell laptop, with a ‘It’s not just food, it’s M&S food’ in the microwave and MBT trainers on. A bunch of labels that help show who I am roughly as much as the books on my shelf or DVDs piled around the tv. With the plus factor that I get to carry them around with me, so everyone gets to see them. And I get to see everyone else’s.

So, what candy bar I get says something about me. Am I going to be a tomboy and eat a not-for-woman yorkie or a hot babe through flake fl**o (to abbreviate politely). My ability to fit into the same clothes as I could ten years ago remains a tug of war between the advertising for food and the unreasonably skinny women eating it. That is a desire dilemma that isn’t a hum so much as a snarl.

So all your advertising informs how I define myself; how others perceive me. Rightly or wrongly, we all hum bits of your various tunes through the day.

Posted by Em on 17 November 2008 @ 2pm

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