400 Words


About 400 Words

400 Words is a storytelling project. It is a print magazine and a website, consisting of true stories, none over 400 words, by ordinary people on assigned themes. It's about the documentation of everyday life, saying a lot by saying a little. You can learn more, or order a copy, or tell a story of your own.

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Cheese

by Martha—Age 26—Portland, OR

‘I’m looking for an entry level goat cheese,’ the man says to me. He has some flour tortillas and a couple of chicken breasts in his shopping cart. He looks worried.

I wonder what an ‘entry level goat cheese’ is. I know what a goat is. I know what cheese is. Goat cheese is the result of a process. It’s what happens when grass interacts with a goat, its hormones, a farmer, mold and time. It’s what happens when a bodily fluid is exposed to extremes in temperature, to centuries-old tradition and the market economy. Goat cheese is the result of an accident eons ago when early herding cultures started milking their goats and left some of the milk in a leather sack overnight, hanging from the eve of their hut, or in the corner of their cave. Goat cheese is what happens when you age the goat’s milk, then wrap it in wax, in leaves, or esophageal tubing. I know what this is.

But what is entry level—the point at which you enter? Where the grass enters mouths, stomachs, udders? Is it where the milk enters the world, hot and steaming from the teat? Is it where I enter the grocery store, enter my employee number into the time clock and don my hat, nametag and apron? Is the entry level where the wire enters the cheese, splitting it in two? Is it where the cheese enters the plastic wrap, and gets entered into the scale at 15.99 a pound? Is entry level the place where I spend eight hours a day cutting, wrapping, weighing and pricing the bodily fluid of an animal, this cheese, the result of a process that begins and ends with digestion, that begins with the earth and ends with the earth? Is it where I package my own bodily fluids, my blood, sweat and tears into eight hour shifts, ten minute breaks and two week pay-periods?

I look at the man, his face impatient, eager to suck at the teat of my vast cheese knowledge. I feel like telling him that every entry level is also an exit level. That all hierarchy is an illusion. That he should follow his heart. Instead I recommend the Goat Gouda, the Goat Jack or if he wants something saltier, the Murcia Curado.

He thanks me and chooses the Goat Jack.


10 Comments

Here it is: the epitome of the 400 word miracle. What a great pleasure to read the world in a chunk of cheese! Wonderful.

Posted by Rosemarie DiMatteo on 14 September 2007 @ 10am

Who knew goat cheese wrapped in life was so interesting. This one made me smile…say cheese!

Posted by metheothertwin on 14 September 2007 @ 3pm

The packaging of bodily fluids, goat and human. Beautiful.

Posted by Willem on 15 September 2007 @ 6pm

I love admittance to the elaborate workings of the cheesemonger’s thoughts.

Posted by Fancy Ritalin Affected Netherworld Icon on 15 September 2007 @ 7pm

I like the cycle thing. It reminds me of the Ring Cycle. What with the Valkyrie swooping down with the goat cheese and everything.

Posted by Smab Morble on 15 September 2007 @ 11pm

“that all hierarchy is an illusion,” genius.

Posted by Urban Scout on 16 September 2007 @ 2am

I’m positive that if Nabokov wrote more about goat secreting mammies and the creamy formations of the herding cultures it would read a lot like your writing.

Posted by melanie on 16 September 2007 @ 3am

Martha, can you tell us what store you work at? Is it a secret? I used to live in Portland & it’s where I first got introduced to the phenomonon of Fancy Food (TM). I can almost imagine you, at Zupan’s or Nature’s or whatever…

Your piece made me smile like ten times. : )

Posted by katherine on 16 September 2007 @ 2pm

Love this writer. Such great commentary on the strange life of a twenty-something gourmet cheese girl zinester in the big city who perfectly captures the humor in the absurdity of it all.

Posted by camille on 16 September 2007 @ 4pm

i like cheese, but i like you better. once again, you amaze me with your writing. you take something so simple, like cheese, and turn it into a much broader, almost crucial part of the cycle of life. thanks martha.

Posted by casey on 17 September 2007 @ 4am

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